Today is the first day of my one hundred days challenge to write and produce a music album.
I am not a big fan of exposing myself, especially on social media, but I had to do that after two things that happened this last week.
I always had the idea of producing an album, and just recently, a friend of mine released an amazing one, which she did it all by herself.
Just a few hours later, while talking about life with another dear friend, I heard the following.
"You know man, we talk, we study, we read, but... Where are the results?"
Like a punch in my face, there was this epiphany. I linked the dots and finally got aware of what was happening.
As a musician and a perfectionist, the number of content I shared until now is really low. Perfectionism makes me give up on things because they are not good enough, it makes me want to stop creating, because whatever I am creating sucks.
I also constantly procrastinate my art because I am broke, unprepared, and it will probably fail anyway.
I got aware of my habit to hide my fear of failure under this rug with the word "later" printed on it. I felt stupid, coward, and weak.
Later that day, seeking for motivation, I thought of something I read in a book a long time ago, saying that Benjamin Franklin used to announce his inventions without even knowing if he would be able to create them or if they were even possible.
He did that because after telling people about those inventions, he then had a promise to fulfill or his reputation would be over, forever. He dived in, he took the risks. Now, many of the things we have, we have because of Mr. all talk, Ben Franklin.
So here I am now, trying to be more like Franklin.
Now I know that I just can't wait any longer. After all, music is the only thing I consider myself competent enough. I simply have no other choice.